75% chance that google chrome will eat this blog entry and it will never see the light of day so assume that it was something important.

trigger happy

feeding the machine

just another day in paradise...

Please excuse my recent absence. I've been settling into my new home.
I live in Hawaii now, with my Sailor if you've missed that note.
But its actually been fairly eventful and there's quite a bit to talk about, I'll try to keep le wall of text to a minimum.
So for starters:

Movies:
In the few weeks here i've seen quite a few movies both in theaters and in blu-ray wonderfulness.

Hollywood 3D madness ( or magic depending on your cup of tea..) brought me Puss in Boots and The Immortals (all on the same night too!) Other than both of these being at the polar opposites of the spectrum they were both very eye-pleasingly awesome.

Puss was both very cute and well versed in the usual Shrek-style comedy, something for both the kids and the kids at heart.

The Immortals however... Holy Hell on a stick!! I know critics bashed it to hell but thats generally what they do anyways. The imagery was gorgeous and the violence was absolutely amazing... oh and there was a storyline somewhere. My only problem with the movie was Zeus having a porn 'stache. Besides that it was bloody, violent, contain sexual situations and tons of eye candy (both male and female), can't ask for much more.

In non 3D madness i was introduced to another magic.. The world of Harry Potter.
Amazing.. i'm an absolute new comer to this series, so while i let it sink in i'll write about it later.

Books:
My flight here was like a million and 8 hours long, sadly i'm not the kind of person who can sleep all of those million hours. So i picked up a few books/manga and charged up my 3DS and iPod and boarded the plane.. three times thank you layovers.
What I read:
Sailor Moon 1
Sailor V 1
Both are just the recent english translations of the original mangas. Sailor Moon brought me right back to my early teens when i discovered the magic of manga and anime. Sailor V annoyed the snot out of me. I was never much of a Sailor V fan. But regardless the names and characters are true to the original version as the translation kept the Japanese names and inside jokes (with notes in the back of course). I will certainly be on the look out for other volumes.

Games:
Nothing new for me as i'm kinda broke.
HOWEVER he did get Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 for the PS3.
damn. I fell in love with the opening sequence. And if i didn't already love the game, i fell right back in lust with it. In addition to new characters, most of the older characters were re-balanced and given a much larger and personalized trash talk script. For you non-arcade fighters re-balancing is just a reworking of fight stats to more accurately depict a character.
I'm still chipping away at Pokemon Black and HeartGold along with my mission to finally beat Trauma center. I'm close to beating Trauma Center, that game has been testing my patience.. LOL puns.

And thats it for now. The holidays are upon us and i've got my plate full, thank goodness i love cooking.

where the heart is..

for the first time in a long time i got a satisfying night of sleep.

i know this i should be cautious when throwing around feelings about a LTR.

but by god, i think i got it right.

i'm where i'm supposed to be.

and i'm home.

and now you know..

today i learned that google chrome and blogger don't get along.. wtf

leaves aren't the only thing falling

random octobery things

wanna know how i got these scars?

you fucking asshole.

bullshit that you tried to make me feel better about my flaws, you only wanted to capitalize on them.

but what i hate you the most for are these goddamned scars you left on my head and my heart.

how you'd "forget" all the vicious and cruel things you said to me.
i used to feel bad and wished you'd get help for it.
i've changed my mind.
you're a sad little boy from bumfuck new hampshire pretending to be a man in boston.
you talked shit on my city, and everything i love.
then all of a sudden it interests you.
your sugar mama flies you out to so cal, then all of a sudden you love it.

So Cal will eat you alive.

then you break up with the whore after wards.
punk ass move.

but what makes me mad?
is that you accused me of being a gold digger.
you're the one hanging on a clit cause she's got money.
i stopped being able to baby you then you got too busy to see me when we were still engaged.

then now you're accusing me of being a uniform chaser.
Sorry honey, real men sail seas, not jump puddles.

but whats really really making me mad is how you decided you wanted to grind it into my head that i'm not pretty, that i'm weird, that i was terrible in bed.

i remember once upon a time you got angry and weird with me cause i had been with other guys before you. Claiming that you were a virgin.

but once i left you, it was all bragging about your "hotties with bodies" and freaky chicks. Well i see that you like your women to be generic and carry green cards.
and you know, its not cool for you to drill it into my head that i was subpar and on top of it all sucked in bed and was never "sexy"

i hate that you clawed it into me knowing that i scar easily.
"maybe we can be friends" my ass.

you live a fantasy life boy. You're still a nobody from new hampshit

Annual Checkup

Its time for my annual checkup...
You see, this game came out in late 2005 and has been kicking my butt since 2006 and I reattempt to complete it at least once a year only to end up in disappoint. The game that has been tormenting me?

[Or in Japan "Super Surgical Operation: Caduceus"]

It's classified as a surgical simulation game and as a simulation/visual novel. The story line has you in the role of surgeon Derek Stiles, a young surgeon who quickly matures through the stories development. Along with Derek you'll meet Angie Thompson, your assistant nurse. There are many other characters in the game with fairly distinct personalities and roles that are somewhat relevant to your mission.

This game was part of the first wave of DS games and thoroughly utilizes the touch screen features since all of your "operations" are done exclusively with the stylus. Your stylus acts as various instruments varying from scalpel, syringes, lasers and of course you ever so healing hands.

Ah yes, healing hands. That brings us back to our main character who happens to have "healing hands"... he can slow down time. Which will help you in many critical missions down the line.As the story progresses you quickly move from your standard ER surgeries into something more severe. Bio-terrorism. Yep, a mysterious organization is infecting people with terrible, almost incurable diseases known as G.U.I.L.T. And its your job to stop it!! Somehow.

G.U.I.L.T has several strains that require different methods of removal. The challenge of this game is just like a real surgeon, all of your operations must be handled with precision and speed. And eradicating the G.U.I.L.T is tricky, they aren't like normal tumors and lacerations. They move, regenerate and hide, tearing up your patient and patience in the process.

But its still a fun game to play if not frustrating. When you perform your procedures correctly you get a "ok" "good" or a "cool" grade which adds up along with speed and precision to equate your "rank". When you fail a mission, you get plenty of facepalm from your team and superiors. It definitely has some serious replay value because even after you beat the main story line there's still many more missions in which you can perfect your skills as a surgeon.

So while this game is a bit older, its worth a second opinion. Its about $7.99 used at Gamestop, certainly can't hurt to give it a shot.

p.s
If you do decide to play this, I suggest learning to use 2 styli. It will make it much easier.

Woolly Bully

The worse of them are amongst us, like the wolf in sheeps clothing.

In the light of the most recent bullying related suicide the Mother Monster [Lady Gaga to the rest of you] has decided she's had enough and wants reform and a law passed making it so that bullying carries the same weight as a hate crime. Wikipedia states the following on hate crimes:

In crime and law, hate crimes (also known as bias-motivated crimes) occur when a perpetrator targets a victim because of his or her perceived membership in a certain social group, usually defined by racial group, religion, sexual orientation, disability, class, ethnicity, nationality, age, gender,gender identity, social status or political affiliation.^[1]

On bullying it states this:

Bullying is a form of aggressive behavior, which may manifest as abusive treatment, the use of force or coercion to affect others,^[2] particularly when habitual and involving an imbalance of power. It may involve verbal harassment, physical assault or coercion and may be directed persistently towards particular victims, perhaps on grounds of race, religion, gender, sexuality, or ability 

 There are many parallels to both behaviors. Whether bullying is the same as hate crimes or whether they are truly two separate behaviors is a very volatile and debatable argument. Regardless of your opinion on the matter we as a society need to be more aware and active about the abuse.

Earlier this year at a White House conference on bullying prevention Obama said that he hoped to "dispel the myth that bullying is just a harmless rite of passage or an inevitable part of growing up, its not." At this conference it was also stated that bullying affects about 1/3 of school kids. I feel that the number should be higher, in fact another source says that 77% of students have been bullied and that cyber bullying just increases the numbers. It makes me sick to my stomach that a society and culture that many kill to be a part of chooses to neglect such a serious topic.

Yeah every couple of years a situation occurs and it becomes the trendy topic and everyone just sits there and points fingers. From Columbine even up to last years trail of Gay suicides it just shows that nothings changed but the names and faces. Maybe the motives for the bullying is different, but its peanuts, cashews and almonds... its all nuts in the end.

But back my intended point. I was browsing through comments about Mother Monsters call to action and was appalled by the amount of stupid on my screen. While I totally agree with her that when bullying escalates and becomes a motive of death that it should absolutely carry some weight like a hate crime. I think we as a society need to understand what is happening.

The problem with being "American" is that we're too absorbed of our culture to the point where we start to shutter ourselves back into this safe bubble. Anything and everything that is different or unique has somehow become the enemy and a threat. Those very traits are the reason this country was even founded, its what we're fighting for isn't it? The right to be free? The right to be different?

Apparently not. One comment struck me in my core and is the reason I sit here writing this.
One reader stated

Lady Gag-me is a freak. She's the last person that should be standing up for bullying. No one takes her seriously and its not like her fans are the problem. We need to target the "gangstas" and the "metal" kids. 

The commenter went on to say that metal kids are trouble makers and that they're all closed minded bullies. Excuse me, but I believe you just called the kettle black. Have we not learned from the West Memphis three?
To speak against bullying yet in the same comments, you go and group music fans as devil worshiping delinquents because of how they look and for what they like? That is what we call counter productive. I think the worst offenders of the "hate" mindset are lying right amongst our herds and sadly they don't even realize that they are the wolf.

Ugh. But anyways, besides the minor rage I wanted to say this:
I've been bullied for most of my life. For reasons ranging from having a cooler lunchbox to not being "Asian" enough to just plain being different. Bullying is a serious thing, and from what I've seen its only gotten more severe as each passing generation. It needs to stop, make them stop, its the only way that it'll get better.

You know what happens when you assume?

You take things for granted. More importantly you take things without proof.

Our current society is one that loves to assume. We've built a culture rooted in lust and loathing. So naturally love and hatred are also key players. 

Now that I've gotten you started on today's lesson in sociology I'll get you started on some anthropology as well.

By definition Body Modification is: 

"any method of permanently adorning the body, including tattooing and piercing"

This practice goes pretty deep (pun intended) and I'm not gonna get specific with time frames and all that things with numbers stuff cause I WILL confuse myself and probably misquote something.
But in generalities, body modification in most cultures is associated with pride, wisdom, maturity and many other traditional beliefs.

Somehow this has become lost in translation.
Like all things once sacred to the counter culture, modification has become a trend.
Kids are "gauging" their ears in mere weeks.

Anyone can give and any one can receive a tattoo.

[note: Tattoos are another touchy subject. I'll come back to that later]
Hell to 1-up temporary tattoos you can now buy fake "gauges" at Claire's!

{you should totally get them kids. OMG mom will totally freak!}

My personal grievance is that thanks to the popularity of Suicide Girls and Scene Queens my personal movement has been declared trendy for the sake of fashion and attention. Don't get me wrong I love the Suicide Girls for what they originally stood for and were founded upon, but that message has become a bit diluted. 

[SG was founded on the grounds that girls outside the "norm" are also beautiful, inside and out. Tattooed, pierced, 1/2 fish, whatever]

That being said... Yes, I am a young woman who happens to have a few body piercings, I do dress slightly outside of the norm and I am known to sport non-traditional hair colors and styles. Only recently could I add "tattooed" to that mix. I am very comfortable in the skin i have adapted to myself.

Wish I could say the same for others. The majority of people (my tattoo artist included) always assumed that I must own a plethora of skin based artwork. Many people also assume i have a myriad of piercings, I only have 5; my septum, a set of 7/16 stretched lobes and a set of standard lobe piercings. That's not very many my dear readers. And believe it or not, I have a story for each one. Ready for it?

My stretched lobes started about 26 years ago when I had them pierced as a child. This is pretty standard cause in most cultures a young girl getting her ears pierced is "pretty" and quite normal. About 5 years ago I got interested stretching my lobes. I had seen it on a couple of people/musicians/things and I started to look into it. I read up on the cultural meanings of it in tribal societies and was very intrigued by the symbolism. Significantly about how stretching ones lobes were a symbol of patience and wisdom. Back before pens and pencils, way before iPads and Nooks, stories/history were passed down from person to person. One would have to sit around patiently and listen to gain this wisdom. Impatience would only lead to forgotten stories and foolish actions and words... much like a lot of  kids today who rush the process in their beliefs that bigger and faster is better. The history struck me in my core, I slowed down my life and took everything in so i wouldn't miss another beat. The other point I made to myself when i began this modification was that I lost most of my hearing at a young age. My ears don't function the way they should, but I have to face the fact that I can't do anything about that. Stretching them even to a measly 7/16 of an inch has showed me to slow down, take things as they come and don't miss a beat, its the only way to understand and gain control of yourself.

My septum came next, I had it done in 2008. I can't talk about the motivation to have it done because.. well it's just too personal. But what it represents is that there's 2 sides to every story whether you see it or not. I can wear it visibly or i can easily hide it with a flip of a bar. 

And my second set of lobe piercings? They're for balance. They visually balance out my stretched piercings and give a little bit of "normal" to the mix.

My hair is constantly evolving and is just an extension of my moods.It calms me when i change colors, it invigorates me when I style it. Some people do drugs.. I do my hair.

My Tattoo is brand new, and states "too weird to live, too rare to die" with a Deathbat . I firmly believe that I'm the last of a dying breed, maybe even one of a kind. In my 27 years of blood, sweat, and tears I cannot stress how much.. well stress I've endured for being "weird" and "different". Well I'm not sorry for that. So screw you, {you know who you are} don't ask me to change for the sake of fitting in.  The source of the line comes from two places near and dear to me. Its originally found in "Fear and Loathing in Las
Tattooing is a tricky think in pop culture, they've become popular and literally everyone and there mom is getting one. Yet some how owning one will get you lumped into a pile of mischievous delinquents with no care in the world or concept of civil living. I completely disagree with that because that pile of mischievous delinquents holds some of the most intelligent and interesting people in the world. Besides, how many civilizations do you know that were build on peace and calm? A little raucous never hurt anyone.. [well it did but that's not the point]

Now that you know a little background on what I have, I ask you... was that what you expected to hear?

I take pride in breaking the molds that have been set. And I get to do this quite often in my public life. By trade I work in Management, retail specifically, and I love nothing more then to blow the minds of the close minded and ignorant by looking like your standard IDGAF punk but speaking in a very articulate and professional manner and actually having answers to their retarded questions. I'm often told that I'm smarter than the average bear and that my looks catch them off guard. Fine by me, cause I didn't get this way without busting my ass.

That being said, there's a price to pay for vanity. You can go the quick and foolish route, or you can take the slow, steady and smart approach.

BTW, don't assume you know my story... you'll just make an ass out of u and me.

"I Will Destroy Everything You Love" or "Countering the Counter Culture"

Maybe I'm getting too old to understand the current generation.
Maybe "pop culture" really is a heartless beast.

Regardless, over the past few years I seem to have become an elitist for what was once a sacred sub-culture. Everything that was once uncool to be/do/like is cool, and thanks to the media (social and traditional) and a culture where looks are everything. I am pretty heavy on the whole social media thing, I do have a Facebook, a Tumblr, a Twitter. I Skype/AIM/Stikkam. You name it, I've touched it. One thing that i have noticed a huge rise in, is the popularity of  "alternative" culture, specifically "geeks". Its now trendy, fashionable and... sexy?
[side rant: ..could've sworn that when I was younger and gave a damn, being an "alternative geek" just meant I went home in tears from the negative reception]

Unfortunatly there is a large percentage (mostly female) population who feel that the only way to survive is by constantly being on the cutting edge of "trendy, fashionable, and sexy" so lo and behold! Geek is in and there is money to be made! Which now brings me to my original point of disdain... Hot Topic.

Don't get me wrong, once upon a time I LOVED shopping there. Hell, I even did my time working there for a year. I tell ya, the place has changed. For a company built on "everything about the music", they've lost their values. Music is now maybe only 25% of their focus. Maybe. The other 75% has become "everything that is not Hollister, but still cooler than Spencers". That my friend translates to whoring out "pop culture." This in itself is a bittersweet pill. It means that now I can find all the Pikachu shirts in the world and not look like a weirdo wearing it. But it also means that every mall rat will buy it as well so they can be cool and impress that boy or girl who says " OMG PICKACHOO. I REMEMBER THAT CARTOON" [side rant # 2: have you kids even played the damn game? Cause you certainly can't even spell Pikachu right] In short, everything that was once sacred is now easily accessible. That Transformers or Jem shirt you had as a kid? I can buy it at the mall and it'll look twice as worn as your original shirt!! And don't even get me started on piercing and body jewelry, that's a whole 'nother rant. I've already taken up enough of your time.

Bottom line is, while you should be proud of what you love and should hold it sacred, take it for what its worth cause the hype machine will come and steal your precious'.

PS.
The reason for today's rant? I came across this on the Hot Topic FB:

Apparently Sailor Moon is in this fall. Causing much disdain to my generation who loved the mystery of having to visit Japanese import markets for our swag, this also angers cosplayers that spend many hours perfecting their costume just to have it on a shelf at a mall, bastardized in plastic while we shed a giant tear drop for our beloved Queen Serenity and her court of Sailor Stars

Completing the Circle

In 1994 I was 10 years old.
I also got to experience a movie theater for the first time.
The movie?
None other than the great "Lion King".
I shouldn't have to tell you about the movie, if you don't know message me and we'll discuss this issue in private.
But today, I came full circle with the masterpiece I am thrilled to have experienced in all its glory.

The Lion King has won many awards and remains high in ranks for top grossing films of all time.
Its one of my personal favorites of all time and definitely the peak of the "Disney Renaissance".
It has the perfect balance of stunningly fantastic (hand drawn) visuals and an outstanding score and soundtrack thanks to the fabulous Sir Elton John, Tim Rice and Hans Zimmer. The story is nothing short of what I love about this era of Disney, breathtaking and captivating, just enough action and just the right touch of romance.

But, like I said, I shouldn't have to tell you about the movie.
What I will tell you is how, at 17 years later the movie still took my breath away and had a normally ADHD, fidgety me firmly glued to my seat, staring at the screen in awe. The slight touch of 3D certainly added life to the already vibrant colors of the Serengeti, all the fancy remastering made everything so brand new but so familiar.

Although I haven't seen the movie in years, I knew every line and song, word for word, note for note.
I was very pleased, even with a full theater and the bloody wallet, I was still a kid again.
Better yet, I got to see this with my sister who wasn't even born when this movie first came out and it was still just as magical to relive this masterpiece.

I truly suggest that anyone and everyone should take the time to revisit this film whether in 3d or just 2d its worth the magic. We owe Mufasa's legacy that much, to complete this circle of life and keep this story strong in the eyes of our generation and for the future generations.

Dance Dance Revolution

Sorry kids, I'm not talking about the arcade game. Instead I'm talking about a webseries known as "The LXD"(http://thelxd.com/). It's currently in its third season and can be found on Hulu. It won best original series last year, and I don't see why they don't deserve another award.

The series itself is a spin on the old good vs. evil theme, with key characters on each side possessing unique powers and abilities. Where it is different, is that this story is told through dance. Each episode is around the 7-10 minute mark which IMO is perfect for short attention spans. Most of the dancing IS hip hop based, however the way that it is presented to viewer i don't think that matters and it shouldn't matter to you either. I will give a very basic overview without disclosing much of the story line because I truly feel that you need to see this to thoroughly enjoy and appreciate this.

The LXD itself is the "legion of extraordinary dancers". Individuals possess the powers of the "Ra" which is a manipulation of force through dance-based executions. The LXD are the good guys and the current line up have a ways to go in perfecting their powers of the RA before they can defend the peace and balance.
There is a supporting cast of other heroes on this team with their skill set spanning from tap to ballet but their presence so far has been pretty subtle.

So, like every superhero story worth its salt there's a plethora of evil ranging in motive and skill all after one thing, the destruction of the LXD. Seasons 1 and 2 focused on The OX, the Legion of Doom to the LXD's Justice League. This season has shed some light on Karey's UMBRAS and The Dark Doctor and his growing ranks. The rivalry runs deep on all sides ranging from avenging the death of parents, and just for the sake of world domination.

Each character has a very distinct presence and a unique style. Fan favorites include Glee's Harry Shum  JR as Elliot Hoo and Madd Chadd's inhuman Sp3cimen. The current season see's a continuation of season 1's "robot lovestory" which revolves around Sp3cimens' story. Madd Chadd is amazing to watch, the man is truly robotic and i think its a good place to start. So for now I leave you with the latest episode starring Madd Chadd and the recent winners of MTV's "America's Best Dance Crew" "iAMme". Tell me what  you think and we can go from there. (o^-^o)

new and improved version of nothing

my old blog borked and i need to get back into the habit.. the future is near